Monday, September 26, 2011

Ma Durga's Shongsar.

I was having a chat with my sister this afternoon, and we just got talking about Durga pujo, as thats the only topic thats in every bong mind now, and so we got discussing how much control Ma Durga has on her family. I mean look at her, four children, two girls & two boys, each of them having their own pets, a husband who is always knocked off with the bhaang, whole lot of bhoots & prets, sadhus covered with ash all over, just like her husband does, two bulls & ofcourse her own pet, the big lion. This along with her close companions Jaya & Vijaya & other inhabitants of Kailas. Mount Kailas is quite a big home to maintain & Ma has her own career too of running the whole universe, by carrying out hers & her husband's share of the responsibilities, as he is always too stoned to do anything. There is no place for any mistake here, or else the whole creation will collapse. So does Ma Durga ever lose her cool managing everything all by herself. How does she do it all?

As a husband Shivji is of no help. Her older daughter Saraswati is too busy with her music & rock concerts, and her theatre, etc etc, she is very creative, and doesn't really care for mundane housework & running of the universe. Besides since the time Michael left his earthy body, Saraswati is very involved with him in creating a fusion with vedic symphony & Rock music. Saraswati was bowled over by Michael's Thriller, & ever since she was waiting for him to die & come over to join them at Kailas. Their aim is to create a bang louder and stronger than the big bang that created this universe. Probably Sarawati is looking at some ideas about creating another universe where only she will be ruling. The present universe will forever be ruled by her parents, and Saraswati is not interested in collaborating with her siblings, especially Laxmi in helping their parents run the universe. She never really liked the importance that Laxmi got from everyone. A new bigger and stronger bang might help in making a parallel universe where only she rules. Her swan can fly high & miles together without tiring out, so that way she can keep coming back to this universe on its back, thus keeping in touch with this side of existence too. Quite clever. This situation suits Ma, as Saraswati and Laxmi never got along, You see, Saraswati has this complex that Laxmi is loved more by earthlings than her, infact no one really cares for Saraswati, that is why from giving knowledge of eternity, and fine arts, she has changed her profession to rock & pop music. Another problem is that Saraswati is wedded to a very very old Brahma, whereas Laxmi has Vishy head over heels for her attention, and Vishy is quite a catch, handsome, witty, flambuoyant, and quite a good career. The guy has the charge of maintenance of the whole universe, no leaf also can sway in the breeze without him wishing for it.

On the contrary, Saraswati being so highly intellectual, no Gods were brave enough to come up to her and ask for her hand. And intellectually it is Brahma's experienced knowledge through endless creations, that impressed Saraswati in the first place. Also being very old Brahma is quite starry eyed about Saraswati, at this ripe old age, a young, heavenly beauty with equal brains, is his spouse, who wouldn't like to be in his shoes. He loves to pamper Saraswati, and her wishes are his command. Saraswati enjoys the attention & because he is very old, he cannot tag along with her everywhere she goes, so that leaves Saraswati totally independent. But she still cannot get over the fact that her husband is old while Laxmi's has the young and charming Vishnu as her husband.

Laxmi on the other hand keeps all of earthlings attention glued to her. With ups & downs in their stocks, keeping everyone running after her all the time. She loves getting attention, but prefers to keep the noise down. Her approach is silent, she slips in and out of peoples lives silently. She has created an aura that she loves silence, cleanliness, daintyness, beauty, and so who ever leads such a lifestyle, she smiles upon them. At the same time she has managed to create an impression that one wee bit of displeasure & she will just leave that person and walk away. No wonder poor earthlings are always looking for ways & means to keep her pleased & happy always. They are always busy doing rituals to please her, so that she spends all her time in their homes & lives.

Laxmi's most favorite season is the Dipavali. At this time earthlings leave no stone unturned to make her feel comfortable, and happy. The poor things stay up all night in singing her praises and offers her all that they have so that she is pleased and gives them more in return. No wonder her pet is an owl, they can see well in the dark, so it helps Laxmi to go about in the dark moonless night of Amavasya during Dipavali. But Laxmi has one grudge against her sister. While Saraswati is always touring the universe and has a very active social & cultural life, Laxmi in her free time has to always sit at the feet of her husband, & serve him. Vishy is all the time with her, so it has become rather difficult for Laxmi to even get a home facial done on her self, without Vishy asking her numerable questions.

Ma is aware of her daughters lifestyles but doesn't really care, as long as the two girls are busy in their own lives, they are off her back. You see, out of her love for her daughters she had made it a condition during their marriage to Brahma & Vishnu, that after marriage too they will continue to stay with her in Kailas. Brahma & Vishnu too didn't mind, after all they too get to stay in the beautiful Kailas, & get pampered by everyone. After all they are dually important, on one hand they are Shivji's very intimate family friends, & now they are the Jamais

When Ma wants to get her accounts straightened, she just has to tell Laxmi, and Laxmi takes care of the rest. After all there isn't a single day when people down on earth doesn't offer her special prayers, Laxmi always gets more offerings than any of her siblings. As for Saraswati, as long as she is busy rocking & popping, there is peace in Kailas. Mother definately has better work to do than settling quarrels between her daughters.

Ganesh is always engrossed in reading and writing, and since all the creatures of the universe along with earthlings too, are always queuing up before his office for license in order to start any work down on earth, he rarely has any time to help his mother. Even his wives Riddhi and Siddhi help him in discharging his duties, so they are not really much of help around the Kailas household. Besides his large belly always keeps him hungry, so he has to eat frequently. Not to forget, his little rat, always sneaking here and there stealing food. His master might be big & huge and so has an insatiable appetite, but this little mouse too doesn't stay far behind inspite of his size. Along with his licensing job, Ganesh always has to keep an eye on the rat. He had to face many embarassing situations because of his rat. Once the moon almost fell off the sky laughing when he saw Ganesh passing by riding on his rat. This had infuriated Ganesh so much that he cursed the moon that who so ever saw the Moon on Ganesha's birthday, in the month of Bhadrapad, will face all kinds of obstacles and false accusations for the rest of the year ahead. Earthlings till today are paying for the sin that Mr. Moonie comitted. Mr. Moonie, the bully that he is, decides to look his best & shine bright on every Ganesh Chaturthi, and poor earthlings who cannot resist the temptation of admiring him, always face the wrath of Ganesha's curse, well Mr. Moonie hasn't got much to lose here. But whenever Ma needs sensible advice, its always Ganesh whom she trusts. Among all her children he is the only one who is cool headed, and doesn't really have any ego issues. The incident with Mr. Moonie was once in a creation, the Moon had become quite conceited with the fact Shivji had used him decorate his locks long time ago. Ganesha had to break the pride of Mr. Moonie. In fact he is one boy who never loses his temper easily. Therefore he always gives the right advice. He als has a lot of paitience, no wonder Vyasa Dev asked him to help in writing the History of mankind, in the Mahabharata. With so many plots, and innumerable characters, and stories within stories, flash back and flash forward, only one with a cool head and patience can sit though and write all of it at one go.

That leaves her youngest son Katik, a hansome confirmed bachelor. No no, its not what you think, he is infact quite straight. His bachelorhood is only because he is too handsome, so theres no one with matching good looks to be Kartik's life partner. Also since his older siblings have chosen their own respective life partners, in Kartik's case his Mother wants to have her say in the choice of the right girl for him. Result, whom Kartik likes, Mother disaproves and vice versa. Back on earth young unmarried girls of the state of Bengal, would wish for a husband who has looks like Kartik. Kartik also is quite courageous. His killing of Taraka impressed all the citizens of heavens so much, that he was appointed the commander in chief of Heavenly army. Mother just sends him across when ever she has to threaten anyone. Just by his presence, anyone can get intimidated.
Mother is assisted by her dear friends, Jaya & Vijaya, in all her work, be it the household of Kailas, or the whole universe. There is nothing that Jaya Vijaya does not know or cannot do. In a way they can read Mother's mind. From getting Ma's bath ready, to making arrangements for her daily rituals to her husband Shivji, organising meals for the hordes of inhabitants of Kailas, to keeping an eye and ear as to what is happening all around creation, carrying all of Mother's errands, they just seem to know exactly what to do & when to do. To assist them is always ever ready Nandi & Bhringi. These two bulls, brainless fools, but they could do anything to keep Ma and their Baba pleased.
As for Ma's husband Mahadev, there couldn't be another husband in the whole universe who could compare with Him. He is ever supportive and hopelessly in love with His Ardhangini. to the point that when in her past life as Sati she gave up her body at Daksha yagya, Baba was absolutely shattered. The whole universe had started crumbling so much that Ma had to be reborn, but Baba was so full of Sati Ma, that he would even look at the direction of Ma who was reborn as Parvati now, and was deep in penance to wake up Mahadev and make Him realize that its his Sati only who has returned as Parvati. Baba was totally out of his senses during that era.

After marrying Parvati Ma, Baba had turned over the running of the whole universe and Kailas to Ma and since then he has shut himself up is his own self, totally confident that when Parvati has taken charge, there is nothing thats need for him to do now. She the all in all, the begining, the middle and the end, and so without a care in the creation, he is since then lost in his own self. He never questions, nor gives any opinion, nor stops Ma from doing anything she wants. No wonder all over the country of India, on earth, young girls would love to have a husband who is like Shivji. They conduct pujas in the months of Baisakh, & Sravan to please Shivji Baba, & get the boon of having a husband like Shivji in nature. Once in a while he wakes up, that too when Ma calls him, and takes her along with the children and the pets, to her father's home far down on the plains of the Ganga in Bengal, where a little ahead Ganga had met Sagar long long ago. He he waits for her outside the village of his in laws till Ma finushes her visit and then he escorts them all again back to Kailas. But here again he has a condition, Ma can stay only for five days which includes the day she reaches and the day she starts back for her home. Baba cannot imgine his existence without Ma, without her he just cannot function. But Baba never joins Ma in the visit. He prefers to stay under the bel tree, waiting for Ma. he knows that women, when they go to their parents home, become very childish, and want a lot of attention. There are lots of gossip & news to catch up with & exchange with their mothers. If He were to join with Ma, the whole attention of Ma's family would be diverted to pampering Him. Therefore he feels better to just wait outside the village/town/ city, under the bel tree. Besides Nandi is always there to look after Baba where ever He goes. This arrangement suits Maa too.

To keep things the way it is & in her control, Ma keeps mixing Baba's drinks, personally. She doesn't trust anyone else for the job, she knows exactly how heady & strong Baba would like it to be and the sweetness has to just be right. Ofcourse it was from Nandi whom she learnt to make the drink, because before Ma came into Baba's life it was Nandi who took care of Baba, he knows Baba in & out. Nandi knows exactly where the best hemp grows, and he selects them carefully and hands them over to Maa. He doesn't mind Maa taking over his favorite job of making Baba's favorite drink. This way he gets more time to throw his weight about on the staff, and all the inhabitants of Kailas. Nandi is both Ma's & Baba's favorite & was created by Baba himself eoans ago, much before Maha Sahkti manifested as Sati & became Baba's consort. After Sati passed away & Baba was left alone once again, Nandi used to make heady doses of Bhaang and feed Baba, to keep Him knocked off, so that He doesn't wake up and start missing Sati Maa. When she returned as Parvati, Nandi at once recognised her as his Sati Ma reincarnated. This time he made sure that he would do anything to keep her in Kailas forever. Now they all are a very big happy family, Nandi, Bringi, the lion, peacock, swan, owl, rat, and all the Bhoots and Prets. Bringi I must tell you always sneaks into the kitchen and licks off the left overs from the pot that was used to make the Bhaang, and is always knocked off. You see, a drop of Baba's drink can knock off any living creature, & this is after all a bull. That is why on Shivratri people throng the temples to get just a little drop of Baba's Bhaang prasad & that gets them high is physically & spiritually.

So one would think how does Ma manage such a huge and weired family, and the universe, well she manages it only too well. Ma is a very liberal, indepandant strong willed woman. Infact she is the basis of all womanhood and the whole creation. The power house of the universe, her energy reserves are never exhausted. She is fearless and has all the five senses totally under her control, so much that they sit and stand wake & sleep on her orders. Yet she is ever so loving and compassionate, always ready to forgive, and take all those who cry out to her, right on her bosom, to cuddle & comfort. which is why even in Kailas there has never been any sort of ego problems between the inhabitants, they all know that Ma loves them all equally. Nor do the pets have any favoritism, or dominating traits. They all know too well that Ma also doesn't not take any nonsense from anyone. They have seen many such examples down below on earth, when humans in their greed and total lack of consideration towards one another, and the nature, have faced Ma's anger which spills over in avalanches, floods, famine, earthquakes and worst, volcanic eruptions. Many a civilizations have been lost due to Ma's fury. They also know that when Ma calms down, she gathers all her children into her lap, in eternal rest. The humans never learn though. There have been so many instances when they get influnced by the asuras and make their own lives miserable. Then they keep crying for Ma, & Baba for help. The Devas too aren't any less, sometimes they too get carried away in their superiority complexes, and fall prey to the asuras. Then its again crying to Ma & Baba, for help. Vishnu & Brhama being very close friends of the family, & now part of it too, are always there to join Ma & Baba in their quest to keep putting things right back on earth. Viushnu heavily depends on this family, he is the head of the universe maintenance department, and is always pressed on with loads of work, one mistake from his department and everything can go upside down all over. Together they all work hard to keep the universe running.

Ma wants to keep everyone happy. One would think wow thats a difficult task. Well, not for Ma. All she has to do is keep everyone busy minding their own bussiness. Every woman would want to be the boss of her home and husband, but we all know that men butt in where they are least wanted, and everything goes haywire. For Ma thats not a problem, all she has to do is keep feeding her husband well, and make exotic drinks of Bhaang shove it down her husbands throat. It keeps his throat cool from the eternal buring sensation, since the time he had stored the poison from samudra manthan. Thay way he is always comfortable and knocked off, completely out of her way. As a good wife, she does ask for his permission and keeps him informed, but Baba, being totally intoxicated, just noddes a yes, thats it. Saraswati being busy with all the classical musicians and rock stars down on the earth, she is away most of the time, so that keeps the two squabbling sisters away from seeing much of each other, & Ma gets breaks from the scarcasm & taunts that they often throw at each other. When ever there are little fights anywhere in heaven, Ma doesn't go herself to settle matters anymore. Kartik has grown up to be a hansome strong guy, and all he has to do is just go and present himself at there. The warring parties get intimidated and just calm down. Ma is looking for the right kind of bride for him, but these days one doesnt get a coy shy, docile, dumb girl to be a daughter in law any more. It was by chance that Ma had come accross Kola and had immediately got her Ganesh married to her. That way, Ganesh remains his Mama's boy always, while Kola bou stands silently with her head covered in a corner forever. Till today she has never demanded Ganesha's attention. So he is all the time free to be with Ma and assist her. Ofcourse Ganesh'a has two more wives, Riddhi and Siddhi, but they have always remained with their parents down on the earth. They wouldn't want to live with a Mama's boy, besides the earthlings just love the company of Riddhi & Siddhi. Ma too doesn't want some strong minded women as her daughters in law. Her house must run according to her will, no one must have any say in that. This is why its getting more and more difficult to get any bride for Kartik. Who would want to mary into a house where the mother in law is in full control, while the father in law is always BPKT, & two grown up sisters in law, who also have their husbands living with them as Ghar Jamais, plus the number of animals, birds, ghosts and other weird creatures. Ofcourse one has heard of Kartik having a wife or two some where down on the earth, tucked away in a southern part of the land called Bharat. Even if Ma knows that she pretends that she doesn't. Otherwise she will have to ask Kartik to bring them home to Kailas and then who knows, they might start asserting their opinions too in the affairs of Kailas. Mother-in-law, daughter-in-law relationship, one can never be sure.

What??, is it autumn already, so its time for Ma to ascend down on earth right? Oh I better get going. Have to make preparations to welcome her along with the whole family. There is so much to do and so little time, shopping for new clothes, accessories, getting the idols and pandals ready, bhog and prasad menus to settle, shop for the pujas materials, invitations to send, organise the cultural programes to be held, get all the cooks of the land to start up with the food festivals, ohh yah and the new pujo specials of music, books, magazines to be launched, the work is endless. Maybe I shall ask Riddhi & Siddhi Boudis to help me out, it will make them happy. I think i'll track down Kartik Da's wives too. Atleast for a few days on earth, everyone, can get together, and spend some happy moments. Its puja time so all will be busy in having a good time. And you all too out there, be sure to have a happy pujo, Jai Maa. :D